Okay. My theory is that getting drunk merely exaggerates your personality. When I get drunk, I fall asleep (falling asleep is a big part of my personality these days). When Babson frat boys get drunk, they wave their arms around and take up too much space and yell things at inappropriate times.
Steve S.'s band was opening tonight for Wyclef Jean at Babson. That's pretty cool. So I went with AM, mostly to hear Steve, but we planned to stay for at least part of Wyclef. We got there reasonably early, and claimed spots up near the stage. As more people showed up, we got nudged over more and more until we decided to stand our ground. But then Drunk Asshole showed joined his friends right next to us. Before the music even started, DA was waving his arms around and yelling and swaying and falling into people. AM and I were talking to a couple of Babson girls in front of us (the nicest Babson people I've ever met), and DA whacked AM on the head. Probably if it had been me, I would have just gritted my teeth and not said anything, but Melanie (one of the Babson girls) was like "did he just hit you?" AM indicated that he had, so Melanie brought this to the attention of one of the Babos standing nearby. The Babo told DA to watch where his hands were going. DA apologized to us in a loud, drunken manner, and then went back to doing exactly what he had been doing. After more accidental head-whacking of AM and other people, and warnings from Babo, I switched places with AM and planted my feet. I shouldn't have to give up my spot in the front just because of one obnoxious guy. DA kept swaying heavily into me (and my pointy elbow) but I don't think he noticed. The whole time he was obnoxiously yelling at Jon Ricci's band (with Steve on drums). Did I mention this is an acoustic rock band? I expect moshing and yelling at some concerts, but it was really out of place here. Finally, he whacked one too many people with Babo watching, and one of them grabbed him and threw him out.
After that, DA's friends were really pissed. One guy in particular kept telling everybody who would listen how "fucking ridiculous" it was that "these bitches" got his friend kicked out. Whatever. Sometimes I'm so glad that I don't go to a "normal" school with people like this. But as AM pointed out as we walked back to Olin, all of these Babson students will end up with much more money that we will. Life's messed up. Then again, I'd like to think that if I wanted to dedicate my life to making money, I would be sucessful at that.
Been thinking a lot about gender issues recently. At lunch the other day, Y was talking about one of her classes where teams were being chosen for projects. Everyone in the class went up to the whiteboard and wrote their name under the project that they were most interested in. One project ended up with too many people signed up for it (4 guys and 3 girls, if I remember correctly). Three people would have to switch to differen projects. For a while, everyone sat there, playing chicken. Then one by one, the girls walked up to the board and erased their names and signed up for different projects. Girls are socialized to avoid conflict. To make sacrifices for the happiness of the group. Actually, Y telling this story is what made me so determined not to give ground to DA at the concert. Maybe you think I was a bitch for sticking out my elbow when DA kept falling onto me. I'm not ashamed of doing it.
Other things that SWE (Society of Women Engineers) has brought to my attention:
Steve S.'s band was opening tonight for Wyclef Jean at Babson. That's pretty cool. So I went with AM, mostly to hear Steve, but we planned to stay for at least part of Wyclef. We got there reasonably early, and claimed spots up near the stage. As more people showed up, we got nudged over more and more until we decided to stand our ground. But then Drunk Asshole showed joined his friends right next to us. Before the music even started, DA was waving his arms around and yelling and swaying and falling into people. AM and I were talking to a couple of Babson girls in front of us (the nicest Babson people I've ever met), and DA whacked AM on the head. Probably if it had been me, I would have just gritted my teeth and not said anything, but Melanie (one of the Babson girls) was like "did he just hit you?" AM indicated that he had, so Melanie brought this to the attention of one of the Babos standing nearby. The Babo told DA to watch where his hands were going. DA apologized to us in a loud, drunken manner, and then went back to doing exactly what he had been doing. After more accidental head-whacking of AM and other people, and warnings from Babo, I switched places with AM and planted my feet. I shouldn't have to give up my spot in the front just because of one obnoxious guy. DA kept swaying heavily into me (and my pointy elbow) but I don't think he noticed. The whole time he was obnoxiously yelling at Jon Ricci's band (with Steve on drums). Did I mention this is an acoustic rock band? I expect moshing and yelling at some concerts, but it was really out of place here. Finally, he whacked one too many people with Babo watching, and one of them grabbed him and threw him out.
After that, DA's friends were really pissed. One guy in particular kept telling everybody who would listen how "fucking ridiculous" it was that "these bitches" got his friend kicked out. Whatever. Sometimes I'm so glad that I don't go to a "normal" school with people like this. But as AM pointed out as we walked back to Olin, all of these Babson students will end up with much more money that we will. Life's messed up. Then again, I'd like to think that if I wanted to dedicate my life to making money, I would be sucessful at that.
Been thinking a lot about gender issues recently. At lunch the other day, Y was talking about one of her classes where teams were being chosen for projects. Everyone in the class went up to the whiteboard and wrote their name under the project that they were most interested in. One project ended up with too many people signed up for it (4 guys and 3 girls, if I remember correctly). Three people would have to switch to differen projects. For a while, everyone sat there, playing chicken. Then one by one, the girls walked up to the board and erased their names and signed up for different projects. Girls are socialized to avoid conflict. To make sacrifices for the happiness of the group. Actually, Y telling this story is what made me so determined not to give ground to DA at the concert. Maybe you think I was a bitch for sticking out my elbow when DA kept falling onto me. I'm not ashamed of doing it.
Other things that SWE (Society of Women Engineers) has brought to my attention:
- Imposter Syndrome. Maybe I'll post about that later. It's a lot to think about.
- Behavior in meetings. Women tend to think that each person should get equal speaking time in a meeting. Men think that if they care about an idea, they should express that by talking about it a lot.
- Nodding. Women nod to indicate that they're listening. Men nod to indicate that they agree. This is probably more of a problem for men who misunderstand women's nods than it is for women.
- Language. When writing cover letters or other documents, men use declarative statements that start with "I will." Women tend to say "I hope to" or "I would." I definitely do this. I find it very unpleasant to sell myself in a cover letter--I feel like I should fully disclose to my potential employer that I'm not the world's greatest programmer, even though I try hard. This seems like the honest way to go about getting a job, and it would work if everybody did it. But when half the applicants are saying "I will complete this project efficiently with my programming skills" and the other half are saying "I would like to work with your company on this project. I don't have a lot of programming experience, but I'm willing to learn," which would you hire? What I never realized is that a man and a woman with the same skills will write different cover letters.
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